Prolific centre-forwards are to West Ham United what self-awareness is to a cupboard minister – attainable, but all the time in some way elusive.
Below the possession of David Sullivan, West Ham have bought greater than 60 ahead gamers with various levels of catastrophe.
So it’s one thing of a pleasing shock that Taty Castellanos has not solely fitted in seamlessly, however he’s additionally impressed the very best new chant of the 2026-26 season.
The 27-year-old scored within the FA Cup win over QPR and has helped revive a beforehand moribund assault, liberating up Jarrod Bowen and Crysencio Summerville.
Castellanos opened his Premier League account within the Hammers’ 2-0 win at Burnley with a Teddy Sheringham-esque header from El Hadji Malick Diouf’s depraved cross.
He turned the one hundred and eightieth completely different West Ham participant to attain a Premier League purpose for the membership. Solely Spurs with 181 have extra.
On a dank Lancashire afternoon, the place the clouds cloaked the encircling hills and West Ham have been unusually skilled, a brand new chant emanated from the Turf Moor away finish.
To the tune of ‘Lip Up Fatty’ by ska band Dangerous Manners, the striker was serenaded with ‘We’ve received Taty, and we’ve received Taty Castellanos’.
Terrace anthems are versatile issues, usually latching on to chart music you’d must waterboard supporters to confess any admiration for.
So it’s heartwarming to listen to a ska hit from 1980 repurposed for the Olivia Dean period.
It’s definitely an earworm, one designed to be hummed whereas doing the washing up or standing within the queue at Lidl. Anticipate Arsenal followers to steal and loudly declare it as their very own by Easter.
After a major degree of churn, the Hammers went into the marketing campaign with simply Callum Wilson and Niclas Fullkrug up entrance. No marvel they’ve been circling the drain.
Regardless of a surprising defensive file, West Ham’s precedence in January was hanging reinforcements. Pablo Felipe and Castellanos joined for a mixed £47million, to a lot scepticism from us.
However there’s simply one thing about signing an Argentinian and surviving relegation that’s written within the stars.
We don’t know who made that rule, but it surely’s tried and examined. The unofficial cheat code of Premier League survival, as Carlos Tevez proved in 2007.
Castellanos may very well be subsequent. He’s been referred to as the Poundstretcher Aguero on Knees Up Mom Brown, the long-running West Ham discussion board. You’d proudly stick that on your corporation card or tombstone.
Slaven Bilic as soon as described West Ham as a ‘cult membership’ and Castellanos has all of the makings of a cult hero, hard-working, dedicated and a touch of high quality to make the pursits swoon.
“Each match is a battle, and I’m right here to contribute that, to attempt to convey that power, that combating spirit I’ve inside, so that each match is as necessary and as powerful as attainable,” he mentioned at his unveiling.
West Ham nonetheless have work to do to outlive relegation, however three wins of their final 4 league matches have dragged Nottingham Forest and Tottenham into the battle.
Even Leeds, in good type themselves, are operating quick to face nonetheless. They’ve received some powerful matches to come back and journey to East London in Could on the ultimate day. It’s nonetheless all to play for.
Maybe Castellanos isn’t that aware of the works of Buster Bloodvessel, however the remainder of English soccer is about to turn into very acquainted with this ska anthem.
By Michael Lee
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